I’d seen the memes. I’d read the social media comments. But then I began watching The Mandalorian on the Disney app, and everything changed.

  I. Want. A. Baby. Yoda!

He is so freakin’ cute! I watched all eight episodes over the holidays, and every time baby Yoda came on screen, I perked up. The Star Wars franchise and its spin-offs do not interest me, but with this new show, I’m a fan. All because of this little green creature, who is a 50-year-old toddler.

Remember, this is the Star Wars universe. I didn’t make that up. 

I got to thinking about the feelings that arose in me. They were pleasant feelings. Mushy, gushy feelings that will have me buying all sorts of baby Yoda merchandise. A plush toy here, a bobble-head figurine there. I hope they make one in Swarovski crystal.  I’m going to have little Yodas all over my house. And I will experience pure joy by looking at them.

I remember when both of my nephews were born. Nephew #1 was born on my 23rd birthday. Four days later, I held his tiny body in my hands. He was so cute. Nephew #2, even cuter. I love my nephews. But never have I ever had the desire to have a human baby. The feelings I crave in life are freedom and independence. I seek experiences that enhance what I already have. 

A human baby, or even a baby animal, for that matter, would rely on me to keep it alive.  Goodbye personal space. 

With all the feelings baby Yoda has stirred up in me, the desire to procreate isn’t one of them. If baby Yoda was constantly crying, needing diaper changes, and completely helpless, I wouldn’t find it so cute. I watched Willow (1988 film) the other night for the first time. That featured a human baby. Feeding, diaper changing, crying. I didn’t find that baby cute.

There is a young family across the street from my house with two small children. Every time I walk by, I can hear crying. The father is frequently outside walking the dog. 

Baby Yoda may still be in its early development stage but can already use the Force to protect itself. As a kid I used to say, “If babies were born walking, talking, and 18 years old, I might want one.”  The beauty of life is that I get to choose how I spend my time. I do not want to spend my time raising a living thing, regardless of how cute it may be. 

Looking at baby Yoda makes me happy. I get to enjoy my day, as it is, feeling this happy. Without actually having the thing I’m thinking about. One day, I’ll get my first Yoda stuffie (plush toy). I’ll see another one I like and decide to get that, as well.  So then, I’ll have a hockey team of baby Yodas. They’ll be ethically sourced, I’ll have contributed to the economy, and they will make my house guests smile. They’ll require no food or water, unless I get a chia pet. OMG. I’m getting a chia pet. At night, I can read to them, Comfort Food for Thought. 

 Happiness and joy all around, without forcing life on anyone else. 

*featured image by _freakwave_

LeNora Faye is founder of The Bitchy Bookkeeper; a childfree lifestyle brand. She is also creator of Childfree Journals and 1/3 of the founding non-mothers of Childfree Girls.